How's Your Marriage Going?

How’s Your Marriage Going?


“How’s your marriage going?”


“I think we’re close to the end.”


“Oh? I’m sorry to hear that.”


“Yeah. no. thanks. I mean. It’s ok. We’ve been growing apart emotionally for several years now.”




“Yeah. Barack and I had a lot of hope at the beginning, and I think we had some great moments, but it’s time to move on.”


“I’m so sorry to hear that.”


“Yeah, it’s been a long haul, and you have to promise NOT to tell anybody. I mean NOBODY can know.”


“Of course. Of course.”


“And…actually…I’ve been seeing a few people on the side.”




“I know. I know. I’d be the last person to cheat.”


“I have to say, I am surprised.”


“Me too. And to be honest, I’m not sure I even like the people I’ve been seeing.”


“You mean you’ve been seeing more than one?!”


“Yes…two, to be exact.”




“Yes, and Barack knows. We have an understanding. He’s actually been great about the whole thing. I think he feels hurt, but he gets it.”


“Well…who are they?”


“You have to PROMISE not to tell.”


“Yes. Yes. I promise.”


“Well, I can’t name names. But the first guy is rich. I mean, we’re talking YUGELY rich. But he’s crazy. He’s kind of all over the map, yet somehow he’s able to keep it all together in spite of his ups and downs…”




“I have mixed feelings about him. It’s exciting when I’m with him. I feel this incredible energy. But I can’t help feeling like I’m a prize or piece of property, but, I like feeling like I’m the one who won the prize, like I’m the most beautiful.”


“I’m blown away. This is crazy. I just never would have thought...”


“I know. But you’ll never guess who the other one is.”


“Other one lol”


“Yes, she…”




“I know, it was a shock to me too. I’d never been with a woman”


“I just never thought”


“Thought I would be having two affairs, one with a man, and one with a woman? You’re telling me.”


“Well…who’s the other?”


“She..again, I can’t name names, but I admire her greatly. I think she’s struggled in a way that I have stuggled, but I can’t help shaking the feeling that I don’t trust her.”


“So you trust the guy more than the woman?”


“Well, not exactly, honestly, I’m not sure I trust either one. It’s all very exciting, but sometimes I feel like I’m on a merry-go-round of choices where I’m always left with less than perfect options.”


“So, not to be blunt, but what are you going to do?”


“Barack and I have been on the outs for a long time, and I guess I’ll wait and see with the other two.”


“Kind of sounds…exciting, but also sounds like you’re in a bit of a pickle.”


“I know, I feel like at a certain point I got off track, and I just started picking the wrong guys.”


“What do you think threw you off?”


“Well, it’s kind of like the devil. He’s always there to tempt you with your every desire. But after awhile, you realize the desire is the suffering, you know, like in Buddhism.”




“Nevermind. I’ll have to pick one of the two at the end of the day. I just can’t stand the thought of being alone, even though I also in many ways hate the cheating. Barack and I have actually been hammering out the terms of our divorce.”


“This is all so shocking!”


“Oh, come on. Everybody knew we had our problems.”


“Yes, but it’s such a tragedy to see a friend go through a divorce.”


“I know, but we gave it a good go. Like I said, NOT A WORD.”


“Of course. Of course.”


“It’s just amazing. In the beginning of a relationship, there’s so much hope. Now I feel bitter, angry, and cautious when I enter into a new relationship.”


“I’m just so surprised by all of this.”


“Stop saying that.”




“To answer your question, the divorce should be finalized by November, and I’ll have made a decision by then. Probably move in with one of them by January.”


“It’s all so fast.”


“Yeah, and it’s like I never have time to get any perspective. But like I said, even though I'm not happy with all of this, I just can’t stand the thought of being alone.”